I want to extend my most sincere apologies to anyone who happened to be near me in Meijer's this morning that had to witness my daughter throwing up her cereal and banana breakfast in the middle of the aisle. And all over herself. And me. And repeating the process again in the parking lot.
While this was less than amusing at the time, I think it was God's tongue-in-cheek way of pointing me back to Him, and reminding me that no matter how much I want to control everything, I just simply cannot.
Last night during my devotions I strayed, as I have been doing quite often lately, from focusing on Him and what an awesome God He is, to me and my laundry list of worries. It was almost embarrassing, really, the things I was choosing to spend my time talking to Him about, when I hadn't even bothered to concentrate at all on the ways in which He is at work in my life, and in the lives of others around me, and on the many areas I should be seeking wisdom and guidance as to how to become a better disciple of His. Nope, at one point I think I may have even prayed that Dana and Eliza's upcoming birthday party goes well, and that I find the time to get some things ready for a garage sale. My list was specific, my list was long, and my list was all about me.
And while I know that we can bring all of our concerns and worries before Him, I'm pretty sure it came across as more than a little selfish of me to run through my roster, say a quick prayer for safety for me and my family for tomorrow, and then say amen. It's no wonder that this morning I found myself knee-deep in my daughter's Cheerios, lamenting over the fact that nothing in my life goes as planned, that I can't even get my groceries without calamity ensuing, and woe, woe, woe is me. I needed something to happen to wake me up from the pity-party I was in the middle of throwing myself, and nothing short of me losing control when my daughter lost her breakfast was going to grab my attention.
(Ironically, upon my return to the store a little later, minus said sick child, this verse was read in my car over the airwaves:
Matthew 6:34 "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of it's own."
Thanks, Lord, I can take a hint!)
So, today it is my goal to make no mention of my earthly desires and fears when I talk to Him, but rather just focus on how He is God over all, both the big things and the small.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got some laundry to finish.
Dear Lord in Heaven,
I pray this day humbled. I know that You have greater things for me to spend my time being concerned about, and yet I still allow myself to concentrate on the ones that amount to nothing at all. Help me to find a balance between bringing everything before You in prayer, and letting the small stuff go. Help me get back to using my time with You to learn more about You, to thank You for everything You are to me, to confess where I have fallen short on my walk with You, and to only ask for the things which will bring glory to Your name.
I'm becoming overwhelmed with the inconsequentials again, Lord, and I need some perspective. Keep my gaze steady on You, and let everything else fall by the wayside. My walk with You is the only thing that will make a difference in this lifetime, help me keep that pathway clear.
I love You, Lord, and am thankful for the creative ways you continue to get my attention. I know I am stubborn, and I think it's great that You know it too, and are still willing to work with me. Thank You for not giving up on me.
In Your Wonderful Name I pray,