Dear Friends and Family,
I'm not even sure how to begin this... how to begin this posting, begin this blog, begin this next chapter in my life... it just all seems very surreal. Since my Dad passed away almost one month ago, I have been feeling nudged by the Holy Spirit to continue the community we started throughout my father's battle with cancer. I had no idea how He wanted me to do this, and until just recently it seemed like it was too much to think about. I am wounded, I am grieving, I miss my father every minute of every day. And up until about a week or so ago I felt as if I had nothing more to offer, as if I had given everything I had to recording the legacy of my father, and I was empty.
But I have missed you. I have missed being able to talk with you about my thoughts, my fears, about the things God has been revealing to me, and hearing back from you endless words of wisdom, and encouragement, and support. You have instructed me endlessly about faith in the face of adversity, about diligence and trust in prayer, and about how to be an extension of Christ to those who need it most. You have taught me lessons I will carry with me throughout this lifetime, and I am sensing the Lord telling me that these times of teaching do not need to end.
I have had a few people approach me since my Dad's death and ask me if I have ever considered writing a book. And while I found this extremely flattering, my first and my most lasting thought was that I just don't have a story to tell. I may have a few anecdotes, maybe a couple of interesting tales, possibly some humorous accounts of times past, but nothing that would fill up more than a couple chapters, and definitely not some sort of epic saga that could hold a reader's interest for a few hundred pages. And so I very easily discarded and dismissed the idea of any sort of writing in any form. But God has not given me peace with this decision. Over the past couple of weeks I have been hearing His voice telling me that even though I may not have my own story to share, it doesn't mean that I do not have any story to share. Namely, His story, and how it can play out in the life of an average, regular person like me who still has so much to learn about Him.
And this is where He has led me today. I do not know what His plans are for this site. At this point I don't know what (or even if) He's going to have me write tomorrow, or the next day, or the day after that. I just know that I need to be open to His leading. I will just plan on doing what I have been doing since the beginning, which is being honest with you about my struggles, my victories, and my love for the Lord. My hope is that you will come alongside of me, search for Him with me, continue to let me know your own thoughts, insights, prayer requests, and struggles, and maybe we can learn from each other how to better serve this mighty and powerful God who longs to have community with us as well.
Dear Lord in heaven,
I pray this day over this website. Right now I have no idea what Your plans are for me, or for anyone who chooses to join me on this journey, but I know we will be blessed if we commit ourselves to seeking Your face. You are a God of great things, and we choose to follow You once again into the unknown, armed with the assurance that You desire to draw us close to You, to teach us about You, and to give us many more reasons and opportunities to love You.
Please guide me as I take on this endeavor, as I feel very much in the dark at this moment. But Your light shines brightly, Lord, and I long more than anything in this world to bask in it's glory.
Thank you for Your body of believers, for those who desire and are dedicated to searching You and knowing You too. Honor and bless our faith, Lord, for it is You who we are trying to meet.
In Your Son's Most Holy and Precious Name,